The day I dropped the guilt and embraced our village


This post was created in partnership with Kids & Company.

One vivid memory I have during my pregnancy with Beau, is having Mike drop me off at the hospital’s labour and delivery room, (not in labour), sitting myself down, and feeling a flood of tears making their way out. Before I knew it, I was sobbing uncontrollably.

At the time, Holden was eighteen months old. I was struggling with a child who hated life at the time and I was about to bring a newborn into the mix. Without having said much about my then situation, two incredibly compassionate nurses rushed to my side as if almost knowingly, and proceeded to share their own parenting horror stories.

They then offered what I strongly believe to be the best parenting advice every parent deserves to be in on: “Get. Help.”

Before this I had never considered getting help. I assumed that as a parent it was my job and my job alone, to take care of anything and everything. It was almost as if these nurses had freed me from the guilt I would have felt had I sought after help. Their encouragement permitted me to be okay with the idea of asking and almost immediately pulled me out of my misery.

toddler and pregnant

I hired a babysitter to come twice a week to be with Holden, while I went out with our new baby girl Beau. Soon after, I moved him to a home daycare two afternoons a week, then three. Holden started to enjoy life more, being around his peers, and I was beginning to manage better as a parent.

Three years of doing this and being home, I was yearning to have more of a work-at-home-mom balance. With this new goal in mind, I looked into where I could use more help. I tried working part-time while my kids were first at home with a nanny, but we later realized that this new arrangement wasn’t quite right for our family.

Over the years my mural painting business, Nesting Story, (yes, that’s where Nesting Story began), transformed into a blog, we added two more kids to our family, and grew our village to include help with cleaning our home every other week.

newborn twins

Today, our twins (Mia and Everly), are at daycare four days a week and both our older kids (Holden and Beau) are in school and attend day-camp during the summer.

Kids and Company has helped our family establish a routine with our twins, prep them for school, and supports our family by creating balance in our world.

With every change in circumstance, I’ve allowed myself to be okay with getting help and it has made a huge difference in our lives. I am a big advocate for women’s mental health and I urge every mother to look for a way to find balance in your life, even if it means having to lean on a friend, family member, or any other support.

It is important to have a career and be able to pay for steady childcare for my kids. To create a routine that works for everyone, is what keeps my family healthy and happy.

It took a long time for me to let go of these expectations I originally set out when I became a new mom. I had this ideal image of myself having everything put together, my career and my family life being perfect. Though I have my career and (at most-times) a happy family, it took some help to get here. I urge you to rid your guilt, and really think about where your strengths and weaknesses lie. Don’t lose yourself in the shuffle. Carve your own parenting path, even if it means getting help. I definitely don’t do it all, and I heavily rely on our village.

With locations all across Canada, Kids & Company is a high-quality care and early development centre that parents can trust and kids will love. It started under the leadership of two moms (one with 8 children!), who felt there was a need for flexible care options in a setting with amazing teachers, community, proven development programs and an understanding of today’s families.

Whether it’s their Grab ‘n’Go snacks, parent workshops, or their complimentary care for date nights and shopping days outside of regular hours, nothing has been forgotten.

Here’s where it gets exciting… right now Kids and Company is waiving the registration fee (a $150 value) for Nesting Story readers! Just email to access this exclusive offer.
One waved registration per family for a newly registering child before December 31, 2017. Subject to availability.

Disclosure: This post was sponsored by Kids & Company. While compensation was provided, all opinions expressed herein are those of the author and are not necessarily indicative of the opinions of Kids & Company.