Bringing Home Twins

Bringing home twins was probably one of the most intimidating experiences of my life. Firstly I was terrified of the hormonal and physical toll I was likely to experience. For example, when my daughter was born postpartum knocked me off my feet. From inconsolable crying to torrential night sweats and almost hourly epsom salt baths, I felt like I had been in a traumatic battle. So needless to say I was terrified of the twin postpartum phase and the hormonal changes times two.

Secondly, I was petrified of bringing home and caring for two tiny babies and one needy toddler. I imagined so many scenarios that ended in me locking myself in the bathroom or taking off down the street half dressed and hysterical. Luckily for me, my imagination made things out to be a lot worse than it was. Do not get me wrong it was a difficult transition, and there were many moments where it was overwhelming and I was on the verge of hysterics. However, as a second time mom I knew what was likely coming my way and this time I was ready for all the ups and downs of postpartum and was well equipped.. The following list I would like to think is what made those first few months tolerable at their worst, and may I dare say wonderful at its best. I am hoping other moms-to-be, twin moms or not will find this list helpful to them as well.

Bringing home twins was probably one of the most intimidating experiences of my life - Fallon Melander for Nesting Story

Mom Friends: someone who you can turn to, who at that exact moment is also experiencing what you are as well. For me it was a neighbour whose son was born two weeks after the twins. We quickly bonded over life as second time moms. From weekly walks to long coffee chats she was my life line during those precious and sleep deprived months. I was fortunate that I didn’t have to look far for a mom pal, but I definitely suggest connecting with other moms through facebook groups, local early years centres or even through apps that are available specifically to connect moms.

Smash + Tess Rompers: I lived in these! So comfortable, flattering, loose in all the right places, perfect for breastfeeding and dare I say pretty cute too. The last thing I wanted to think about postpartum was what I was going to wear. Being able to pull this romper out and put it on within seconds made it a huge win in my books.

Native Deodorant: as I mentioned above, postpartum sweat is real, and so is postpartum smell! For me this deodorant not only worked amazingly well, but it also is aluminum free, cruelty free and paraben free, so I felt safe wearing it around the little ones

Sleep Consultant: this is probably my number one recommendation for twin moms-to be. When I found out I was expecting twins I connected with another twin mom who just had twin boys. She recommended a sleep consultant that she had hired who not only assisted with forming a sleep plan for twins, but also provided overnight sleep support – aka stayed up all night with the babies while you and your spouse slept! Obviously this is not an affordable option for everyone, but for us it was life changing. As you can imagine as a pumping mom I was functioning on very little sleep, as was my husband who was up every few hours feeding one of the twins as well. The ability to have a trusted person in our home looking after and feeding our twins twice a week allowed us to recharge and emerge as functional human beings again. 

Bringing home twins was probably one of the most intimidating experiences of my life - Fallon Melander for Nesting Story

Swaddle and Sound Machine: these were both life savers for us in ensuring our twins fell asleep and stayed asleep, and were recommended by our sleep consultant. With my first child, who hated being swaddled we used terrible velcro swaddles that she would always manage to break out of. We also gave up so easily on swaddling her because she would protest. We also had a sound machine that would turn off just as she was entering into her next sleep cycle, and would wake up. To remedy this with our twins we used the “Swaddle Up” zip up swaddle and used an inexpensive sound machine with a continuous play function we bought on Amazon. 

Snap n Go Double Stroller: I used this baby until the bitter end, when I literally thought it was going to collapse under the weight of the twins. Although this stroller is not the easiest to maneuver and I would not recommend taking it for long trail walks, it was amazing for quick trips into the mall or grocery store. Being able to keep the babies in their infant car seats while quickly snapping them in was invaluable. A bonus, I was able to score one from a second-hand store and definitely got my money’s worth. 

Swing and Bouncy Seat: having numerous places to put the twins down was essential, especially when I was solo. From swings, bouncy seats, baby loungers, rockers, you name it we had it at some point. Every baby is different and instead of buying two of everything I bought a few things and then assessed whether it was worth it to buy a second. My house often looked like a baby amusement park at this stage.

Fallon Melander is a thirty-something wife, reformed lawyer and mother to twins plus one

Homemade Frozen Meals: easy, delicious and fast. That is all you need when you are home, exhausted and hungry! I enlisted my mom to make a bunch of healthy meals that we could freeze and eat without worry.

Diaper Stockpile: especially for twins, you will not believe how many diapers you will go through. Disposable or reusable, stock up in advance! Our family threw us a diaper party and the amount of time and money we saved was such a gift.

Couch: This was a tip that I learned from the Nesting Story blog and probably one of my favourite nursery design decisions ever. I initially intended on purchasing an oversized glider for the twins room but quickly decided that even though it would allow me to sit with both twins, my husband would have no place to sit. Nesting Story showed me how a loveseat sized couch was perfect for not only allowing two people to sit and feed the babies, but also allows a place for one baby to lie down (supervised and within reach) while feeding the other baby. The couch is still used today by us to cuddle, read stories and lounge on while watching the twins play. 

Honourable Mentions: good quality double breast pump, tons of activities to keep any older siblings busy, dry shampoo (this is how I often “washed” my hair), adult diapers for those post-birth days/weeks, and a huge water bottle – stay hydrated and combat all the water loss.

Fallon Melander is a thirty-something wife, reformed lawyer and mother to twins plus one. As a survivor of anxiety and depression, she hopes that by sharing her story she can help to inspire and bring others together.

How I Found My Confidence As A First Time Mom

This post was created in partnership with hydraSense®. Always read and follow the label.

When I tell people that for me, four kids are easier than one, a look of utter confusion comes across their face. Recently I said this to a father of one, as he argued with his toddler, who refused to put on his hat and mittens on a very cold day. He watched as I herded my four kids into our toddlers’ daycare, each wearing their winter gear without complaining.

Four kids

I gestured to my litter of kids and said, “It’s a group mentality thing. They each see the others bundling up so they don’t resist.” Then I could hear the words coming out of my mouth before I could stop them… “Actually, I find four kids easier than when I just had one.”

“Yeah right!” He said with a look of disbelief on his face.

“It’s true,” I said. “I might be busier but I stress so much less.”

It is true. It took me a long time to find my confidence as a parent. In fact, my husband and I each completely broke down within the first three days of becoming parents, and it was my mom who finally pulled us out of the darkness and helped us find our first bit of confidence as parents.

When Holden, (our first child) was born, he had a bit of fluid left over in his lungs. Because of this, almost every time we laid him down for those first few days, he would gag and cough a little, which to brand new parents was absolutely terrifying.

Although the nurses kept reassuring us that this was normal and would pass, that all we had to do was put him up right and give him a little pat when he was coughing, we couldn’t get past the fear.

That first night in the hospital, while my husband Mike curled his very tall body into a foldout chair, trying to grab a little sleep, I laid awake, all night just staring at my baby.

newborn

I was in love. This was a brand new kind of love I had never felt before, one that was a mix of awe and absolute devotion. This new self-sacrificing love, mixed with fear started to fester into an unreasonable mindset for both Mike and I… we agreed we would just stop sleeping and hold our new baby upright at night as long as we needed to.

So, the second night was Mike’s turn. As I slept as much as I could between feedings, he sat on the couch and watched movies all night as our brand new son slept vertically.

father kissing baby

As the third night approached, we were unraveling. The adrenaline had worn off and the pain of breast-feeding had kicked in. Mike offered to take the night again.

My mother, who was staying with us, watched with worry, and finally, after observing our unrealistic devotion and subsequent demise, thankfully decided to take over. Her plan: we go sleep and she would put Holden down as she slept on the floor beside his crib.

This was the best gift we could have been given, a way to safely find our confidence as parents. The next morning we felt brand new. Holden had gagged a couple of times during the night, but worked it out himself as my mother looked-on trying not to interfere with him figuring it out himself.

newborn sleeping

From this point on we found our rhythm, but as all new parents experience, every bump in the road was brand new and scary for us, whether it was teething, or our son’s first cold.

But we found our way. We found parenting hacks, little tricks, learned his noises and products that we trusted and loved.

As a result of our initial scare as parents, we found that when our son got sick, we would get particularly worried. One product that we not only trusted, but has helped us gain even more confidence as parents is the line of hydraSense products that was our go-to, whenever any of our babies got a stuffy nose due to a cold.

twin girls

We have always found comfort knowing that hydraSense is a 100 percent natural source, simply being seawater. It’s free of any medications or preservatives and is the #1 nasal saline solution brand in Canada for children*.

hydraSense

hydaSense Easydose Vials

The Easydose® Vials are convenient when on the go with your little one. Just pop them into your diaper bag and pull out when your child is having trouble breathing because of dry or obstructed nasal passages due to a cold or allergies.

hydraSense Easydose Vials

But I think my personal favourite hydraSense product that we still use today with our twin toddlers is the hydraSense® Ultra-Gentle Mist.

hydraSense Ultra-Gentle Mist

Everly, one of our twins has always been prone to nasal congestion. She has found relief from nasal spray, such as hydraSense® Ultra-Gentle Mist.

congested toddler

Those first few days as parents spent without sleep and full of fear are now over seven years ago. Finding your confidence not only takes time, but it takes support from loved ones, trial and error and figuring out what works best for your family while pushing out all of the noise.

It gets easier, a lot easier.

You can learn more about hydraSense® at http://www.hydrasense.ca/
hydraSense® is available at your local mass food and drug retailers or online at Amazon.ca

*Nielsen, National. 52 weeks ending Aug 20th, 2016. Based on combined sales of hydraSense Ultra-Gentle Mist, Easydose and Congestion Relief Kids.

Disclosure: This post was sponsored by hydraSense®. While compensation was provided, most of the opinions expressed herein are those of the author and are not necessarily indicative of the opinions of hydraSense®.