advice Archives - Nesting Story

5 Minute Face For The Busy Mom

Being a mom usually means early morning wake-ups, getting children ready for the day, running around managing the household, and staying up too late trying to soak up every last second of alone time you get once the kids have gone to bed. When you think about how much time all of that takes up, it is hard to imagine trying to fit in where you can get yourself ready for the day.

I’ve been there, and I know that it’s easier to run out the door with unwashed hair up in a bun and last week’s makeup still on, but I can bet you don’t feel your best when this happens. I know personally, finding a couple of minutes in my day to put myself together, even just a little bit, can make the biggest difference in my mood and tolerance.

If getting ready for the day feels like mission impossible, then you’re going to love this post. I’m going to share my tips to help you find the time in your busy days to get back to feeling your best with this 5-minute makeup look (and how to keep the children entertained while you do it!)

The first thing that needs to be tackled is how to keep the children busy while you throw yourself together. If you’re an early riser, consider waking up 15 minutes before your children usually wake up to get ready! This way you’re up and dressed without having to balance everything else at the same time. If you need those couple extra minutes (and I’m definitely with you on this one!) my favourite technique is to toss the kids in the empty bathtub with some toys and do my makeup in the bathroom. The children are contained, happy, and busy (for about 5 minutes until they realize what’s happening) and gives you the space to work. If bathtubs aren’t your child’s favourite place, the laundry hamper works just as well. Even better if there are clothes in it that they can throw out of it.

The next step is figuring out what you want to focus on in your makeup routine. With only a small amount of time, you want to make sure you aren’t biting off more than you can chew. Nobody wants to have to stop halfway through their contouring routine because they ran out of time. I like to focus on making myself look awake and fresh (both of which I am usually not) so I try to keep everything simple. Everyone will have different things they want to focus on but the most common things that people want to tackle each day are dark under eyes, dull-looking skin, and accentuating their facial features.

The last step is to use products that are multi-functional and don’t take a lot of work to apply. Choosing products that you can use in different ways in your makeup routine will give you the flexibility to easily change up your look without feeling overwhelmed. I use an illuminating moisturizer to brighten my face and add a healthy glow, concealer for under my eyes and redness, brow gel to tame and darken my brows (remember, the eyebrows frame the entire face), mascara to make my eyes look bigger and more put together, and lastly bronzer to bring back some structure to my face. All of these products can be used in multiple ways such as bronzer in the eyes as eyeshadow, mascara on a q-tip smudged in the lash line as a liner, and illuminating moisturizer under the brow bone and inner corner of the eye to create a more lifted look. This kind of look can be done with minimal brushes and products, easily and quickly. For a full 5-minute makeup routine including my favourite drugstore and high-end products to use, check out my 5-minute mom makeup here – https://elysemorency.com/5-min-makeup/

When the days feel long and the nights even longer you can start to lose the essence of who you are outside of motherhood. It is equally as important to take care of yourself as a mom as it is to take care of others. Remember, you have to put your own oxygen mask on first. Finding 5 minutes in your day where you can get ready can be the difference between a stressful day which feels unwinnable and a stressful day that you come out of feeling okay because you took the time to do something for you.

If you want to learn more quick makeup tips that you can add to your everyday makeup routine, check out www.elysemorency.com. You can also find Elyse on Instagram at @elysemor where she talks about the real and raw life of motherhood and makeup!

Designing for Small Spaces

Maybe it’s a brand new home which these days they keep building smaller and smaller, or it’s a century house that for some reason comes with closets that can’t even fit a clothes hanger. Designing for a small space is something that continues to stress people out. Let me lend some insight by delving into this sweet and petite Toronto home.

With the cost of real estate in the city, every inch counts and this house was ripped to the studs to get the most out of the space.

Designing for a Small Space - Lara Young for Nesting Story

If the project allows it you will want to maximize the main areas, and a proper space plan goes a long way. This old house was once broken up into many rooms and doorways. By breaking down the walls and making this an open concept living space it immediately felt so much bigger. This double sided partition doesn’t only divide the space and create areas but also acts as the media wall/fireplace for both the dining and living rooms. This is a great example of how you don’t need full walls to create zones.

Pick items for the scale of the home. With only a small space for a main floor powder room this area had to be done right. The bathroom size is the right fit with a small scale sink just big enough for washing up and a smart barn door that doesn’t encroach into the hallway.

When you don’t have a ton of area to work with make points of visual interest wherever you can. This could have easily become a forgotten wall above the stairway. Instead it becomes an area of interest with a great wall detail and a beautiful light fixture that plays with texture and shadow.

Planning ahead can make all the difference. For the 100 years before this renovation this master bedroom had flat 8’ ceilings. By investigating what was above the drywall this room gained vaulted ceiling and feels like it has doubled in size. Not only has it gained space but also so much character. This may seem like a big undertaking (which it can be) but keep in mind the ROI as it will also boost the property value.

This room is also packed with smart details like storage under the bay window and sconce lights above the bedside tables to maximize a smaller furniture footprint.

Whatever the challenge may be remember that small scale homes often give opportunity to create character and interesting details. Make sure to think it through before a renovation so there are no missed opportunities.

Lara Young is the Principal of Lara Young Design, and also a new mom. Like many of us Lara is trying to find that quintessential work/life balance. Being her own boss is bringing Lara one-step closer to her dream. You can read Lara’s full bio, or contact her to help with your next design project here.

Preparing Your Skin For the Colder Weather

I hate to admit it but I am a sucker for the colder months. As much as I love the summer, Fall and Winter (for the first couple of months) bring out all the happy feelings! Unfortunately, the colder months also bring out the worst in my skin, as I think it does for most. I’m sharing with you my top tips for preparing my skin for the colder weather so you can have good skin all year round!

1. Drink water, and lots of it!

Preparing Your Skin For the Colder Weather

This is the easiest thing you can do to improve your skin in the colder months and maintain it all year round. By staying hydrated and drink enough water each day, you’re helping your body clear out all the toxins in your skin while hydrating it from the inside out! I challenge you to try drinking water every day for a week and document the first day and the last. You will be shocked at the change that it can have on your skin.

2. Hydrate, Hydrate, Hydrate

Products for Preparing Your Skin For the Colder Weather

Incorporating new and more hydrating products into your skincare can make a big difference for the colder months. During the summer, your skin produces more oils naturally (ie: sweating and humid weather) whereas the air is much drier in the winter (outside and inside due to heaters). To beat the dry air, try using a product like Hyaluronic acid in your skincare before applying your moisturizer. Hyaluronic acid works at helping the skin retain moisture and creating a barrier to protect it from the dry air. The Ordinary Hyaluronic Acid serum is the super affordable and works great at adding an extra moisture boost.

3. Build a routine

Preparing Your Skin For the Colder Weather with a proper skin care routine

It is the hardest thing to get into the habit of, but once you start, you will be thankful you did. Try and get into a routine, morning and night, where you can find 5 minutes or so to do your skincare. It doesn’t have to be a fancy routine that takes hours, but with consistency, you will find your skin can handle the climate change much better. Something a simple as rinsing your face with water and moisturizing it can be enough to leave your skin feeling good all winter!

The colder weather doesn’t have to be a time where you fear for your skin’s appearance. Using these three simple tips you can maintain your beautiful skin all year round.

Setting Expectations for Your Kids

Setting reasonable expectations for my kids and navigating this new parent “epiphany” is something that I will have to practice every day. But it is so worth it.

Do we have reasonable expectations for our kids?

As a parent to young children, doing things together like sitting in a restaurant can be nerve-wracking and unpredictable. If you are anything like me, you stick to the old faithfuls, the loud and slightly overcrowded ones (so that your kids add to the noise, rather than having them ‘be’ the noise).

People-watching is commonplace for me there. I look around at the families, unconsciously examining their table manners, complimenting their kids and feeling guilt-filled relief when someone is having a harder time than me. Let’s be clear about one thing here – the judgments I’m making in these moments, are of myself and the expectations I’ve set for my kids.

Do we have reasonable expectations?

We’ve all seen the families with the “perfect” kids, where no one ends up under the table, they’re eating with their fork and saving half of their chocolate milk for after they eat.

If that is you and your kids, kudos. But that’s not me and mine. And for the longest time, it left me with thoughts like, “why can’t you do that?”

“Why won’t you listen the first time?”

“When I was your age, I had 10 times the responsibility that you do.”

“Can you stop that?”

These sound worse when you lump them together. I don’t say them one after another like this, and most often they remain thoughts in my head. But I am guilty of pulling one out in a moment of frustration.

Reasonable wouldn’t be the way I would describe these. These remarks break onto the surface when I am in an entirely UNreasonable state of mind.

In setting expectations, keep this in mind. You know your child. But, do you know where they are at and what they can do?

So, what’s reasonable? After welcoming twins, our family count went from the “perfect” family of four to a slightly-oversized family of six and I realized something (so simple) that changed my approach to parenting –

Our children are truly one-of-a-kind.

Maybe that’s something you’ve heard before. But now, for me, this ideal has been highlighted over and over again. I hadn’t anticipated that I would need to parent each of my children a little differently.

In setting expectations, keep this in mind. You know your child. But, do you know where they are at and what they can do? Figure out how to meet them where they are, and create an achievable “next step” for them to strive towards.

Setting reasonable expectations for my kids and navigating this new parent "epiphany" is something that I will have to practice every day. But it is so worth it.

Our kids ultimately want to make us proud and the pressure they feel to succeed is real. Know any adults that reflect on their childhood with, “nothing I did was ever good enough for my parents”? If our expectations are met with feelings of frustration or anxiety- on our part or theirs, consider adjusting the expectation next time, even if only slightly.

We can’t change overnight.

Be patient with yourself. Recently, I kept noticing my son and I continually butting-heads. It wasn’t until we were visiting some friends, that they noticed, “wow, where did the sarcastic humour come from?” I had no idea. All this time, he had been trying to make me laugh and I had been missing it, correcting his behaviour – no wonder we weren’t getting along.

Setting reasonable expectations for my kids and navigating this new parent “epiphany” is something that I will have to practice every day. But it is so worth it. Becoming more than “maintaining our image” in a restaurant, we are teaching our kids how to set realistic goals for themselves, start to understand their capacity and ultimately learn to help themselves find success, however that may look to them.

No pressure.

Lindsay Fricker is a mom of four – two plus twins. Kindergarten teacher by day, Lindsay enjoys helping others find ways to navigate the ugly parts of parenting, while keeping their sanity and positively supporting their children. You can read more from Lindsay here or follow her on Instagram @serendipity.six.

Bringing Home Twins

Bringing home twins was probably one of the most intimidating experiences of my life. Firstly I was terrified of the hormonal and physical toll I was likely to experience. For example, when my daughter was born postpartum knocked me off my feet. From inconsolable crying to torrential night sweats and almost hourly epsom salt baths, I felt like I had been in a traumatic battle. So needless to say I was terrified of the twin postpartum phase and the hormonal changes times two.

Secondly, I was petrified of bringing home and caring for two tiny babies and one needy toddler. I imagined so many scenarios that ended in me locking myself in the bathroom or taking off down the street half dressed and hysterical. Luckily for me, my imagination made things out to be a lot worse than it was. Do not get me wrong it was a difficult transition, and there were many moments where it was overwhelming and I was on the verge of hysterics. However, as a second time mom I knew what was likely coming my way and this time I was ready for all the ups and downs of postpartum and was well equipped.. The following list I would like to think is what made those first few months tolerable at their worst, and may I dare say wonderful at its best. I am hoping other moms-to-be, twin moms or not will find this list helpful to them as well.

Bringing home twins was probably one of the most intimidating experiences of my life - Fallon Melander for Nesting Story

Mom Friends: someone who you can turn to, who at that exact moment is also experiencing what you are as well. For me it was a neighbour whose son was born two weeks after the twins. We quickly bonded over life as second time moms. From weekly walks to long coffee chats she was my life line during those precious and sleep deprived months. I was fortunate that I didn’t have to look far for a mom pal, but I definitely suggest connecting with other moms through facebook groups, local early years centres or even through apps that are available specifically to connect moms.

Smash + Tess Rompers: I lived in these! So comfortable, flattering, loose in all the right places, perfect for breastfeeding and dare I say pretty cute too. The last thing I wanted to think about postpartum was what I was going to wear. Being able to pull this romper out and put it on within seconds made it a huge win in my books.

Native Deodorant: as I mentioned above, postpartum sweat is real, and so is postpartum smell! For me this deodorant not only worked amazingly well, but it also is aluminum free, cruelty free and paraben free, so I felt safe wearing it around the little ones

Sleep Consultant: this is probably my number one recommendation for twin moms-to be. When I found out I was expecting twins I connected with another twin mom who just had twin boys. She recommended a sleep consultant that she had hired who not only assisted with forming a sleep plan for twins, but also provided overnight sleep support – aka stayed up all night with the babies while you and your spouse slept! Obviously this is not an affordable option for everyone, but for us it was life changing. As you can imagine as a pumping mom I was functioning on very little sleep, as was my husband who was up every few hours feeding one of the twins as well. The ability to have a trusted person in our home looking after and feeding our twins twice a week allowed us to recharge and emerge as functional human beings again.

Swaddle and Sound Machine: these were both life savers for us in ensuring our twins fell asleep and stayed asleep, and were recommended by our sleep consultant. With my first child, who hated being swaddled we used terrible velcro swaddles that she would always manage to break out of. We also gave up so easily on swaddling her because she would protest. We also had a sound machine that would turn off just as she was entering into her next sleep cycle, and would wake up. To remedy this with our twins we used the “Swaddle Up” zip up swaddle and used an inexpensive sound machine with a continuous play function we bought on Amazon.

Snap n Go Double Stroller: I used this baby until the bitter end, when I literally thought it was going to collapse under the weight of the twins. Although this stroller is not the easiest to maneuver and I would not recommend taking it for long trail walks, it was amazing for quick trips into the mall or grocery store. Being able to keep the babies in their infant car seats while quickly snapping them in was invaluable. A bonus, I was able to score one from a second-hand store and definitely got my money’s worth.

Swing and Bouncy Seat: having numerous places to put the twins down was essential, especially when I was solo. From swings, bouncy seats, baby loungers, rockers, you name it we had it at some point. Every baby is different and instead of buying two of everything I bought a few things and then assessed whether it was worth it to buy a second. My house often looked like a baby amusement park at this stage.

Fallon Melander is a thirty-something wife, reformed lawyer and mother to twins plus one

Homemade Frozen Meals: easy, delicious and fast. That is all you need when you are home, exhausted and hungry! I enlisted my mom to make a bunch of healthy meals that we could freeze and eat without worry.

Diaper Stockpile: especially for twins, you will not believe how many diapers you will go through. Disposable or reusable, stock up in advance! Our family threw us a diaper party and the amount of time and money we saved was such a gift.

Couch: This was a tip that I learned from the Nesting Story blog and probably one of my favourite nursery design decisions ever. I initially intended on purchasing an oversized glider for the twins room but quickly decided that even though it would allow me to sit with both twins, my husband would have no place to sit. Nesting Story showed me how a loveseat sized couch was perfect for not only allowing two people to sit and feed the babies, but also allows a place for one baby to lie down (supervised and within reach) while feeding the other baby. The couch is still used today by us to cuddle, read stories and lounge on while watching the twins play.

Honourable Mentions: good quality double breast pump, tons of activities to keep any older siblings busy, dry shampoo (this is how I often “washed” my hair), adult diapers for those post-birth days/weeks, and a huge water bottle – stay hydrated and combat all the water loss.

Fallon Melander is a thirty-something wife, reformed lawyer and mother to twins plus one. As a survivor of anxiety and depression, she hopes that by sharing her story she can help to inspire and bring others together.