What I remember about my C-Section

This post was created in partnership with Huggies.

When I think back on that day, almost three years ago now, I remember snippets. It plays like a dramatic movie in my head. Detailed scenes fading to black, skipping beats in time.

I am standing in our home whispering softly to not wake our sleeping children upstairs, as my husband, Mike takes some last twin belly photos for me.

pregnant with twins

Fade to black.

I am at the hospital registering. My hands are cold and my heart is fast. Adrenaline has taken over my body and I have Mike speak for me as my mind is foggy and I can’t recall answers to the questions being asked.

Fade to black.

I am in a hospital bed, an IV in my arm, and people are buzzing quietly around me. Mike is on his phone slowly swaying in a rocking chair. He looks up at me with kind eyes.

husband waiting during c section

Teams of doctors and nurses introduce themselves, telling me their roles and which team they are on… baby A, or baby B. I nod in disbelief, thinking, “is this a dream?”

Fade to black.

I am walking into the operating room. The lights are bright, but something has caught my eye, which makes the rest of the room fade away. Two warming beds, ominously waiting for their soon-to-be tenants.

I climb up onto the table as instructed, and with a nurse in front, coaching me to curl my back, while attempting small talk, a team of people place an epidural into my spine.

I don’t feel much. I realize that my mind is disassociating itself from my body. A tactic I mastered years ago when I had my thyroid removed. I am going through the motions, moving like I am in water.

Fade to black.

I am lying on the table, warm, feeling safe, but only half present. Mike arrives beside me. The doctor performing my C-Section keeps trying to make small talk and ask me questions. “Why so many questions?” I think to myself. I eventually hear her say that I am not paying attention, and she begins to chat with Mike instead.

I turn my head to my right, and decide to focus on the warming beds.

Fade to back.

A baby is being held up in the air. She’s crying. I comment on how round her face is… like mine.

Fade to black.
There is pulling, and tilting. Another baby is held up in the air. She is longer, with darker hair and I notice she is a little more squished than her sister.

Fade to black.

“She is having a hard time breathing, we will be taking her to the NICU.” Says a nurse about baby B. There are so many people gathered around her warming bed, that I can’t see her. I notice that baby A is on her own, in her warming bed, content and quiet.

newborn twins

Mike turns to me, and before he can get the words out of his mouth, I say, “go! Stay with baby B.” They leave.

Fade to black.

I am in the recovery room, holding a baby. Shivering. I can’t stop shivering.

after c section

Mike arrives and tells me baby B is going to be fine. Almost immediately following Mike, baby B is brought to us. I cradle my two swaddled babies as I shiver.

holding twins after c section

Fade to black.

I have been moved to my maternity room. A kind nurse has instructed eagerly awaiting family and friends to wait outside my room. She undresses my top half, and unswaddles baby A and places her on my chest. She then does the same with baby B. A blanket is pulled up over us.

She tells me that doing skin-to-skin with my twins for a couple hours will stop my shivering and help regulate my small babies’ temperature. My girls immediately fall asleep and almost melt into my body. My shivering stops, and I feel my whole body become warm, as the morning sun streams through the window onto us.

mom with twins

Family and friends are allowed in. They are disappointed that they can’t hold our babies, and instead take turns staring into their tiny faces remarking on how different they look.

family meeting twins

skin to skin

skin to skin

I am in heaven. I spend the next two hours in complete bliss, knowing that this will go down as one of my all time most precious memories.

skin to skin

April is C-Section awareness month and I have partnered with Huggies to share their No Baby Unhugged initiative, aimed at helping parents maximize precious skin-to-skin time and hugs with their newborn baby. They have created the Hug Plan, which acts as an extension of your birth plan, to help plan for hugs during every moment of your birth experience, including C-Sections. You can download the Huggies Hug Plan here.

Disclosure: This post was sponsored by Huggies. While compensation was provided, all opinions expressed herein are those of the author and are not necessarily indicative of the opinions of Huggies.

2 thoughts on “What I remember about my C-Section”

  1. I experienced the shivers with our third daughter and I completely relate the fade to black snippets. There is something so magical about that skin to skin time though.

    I really enjoy your writing

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